8 “Oh that you were like a brother to me
Who nursed at my mother’s breasts.
If I found you outdoors, I would kiss you;
No one would despise me, either.
2 “I would lead you and bring you
Into the house of my mother, who used to instruct me;
I would give you spiced wine to drink from the juice of my pomegranates.
3 “Let his left hand be under my head
And his right hand embrace me.”4 “[a]I want you to swear, O daughters of Jerusalem,
[b]Do not arouse or awaken my love
Until [c]she pleases.”5 “[d]Who is this coming up from the wilderness
Leaning on her beloved?”“[e]Beneath the [f]apple tree I awakened you;
There your mother was in labor with you,
There she was in labor and gave you birth.
6 “Put me like a [g]seal over your heart,
Like a seal on your arm.
For love is as strong as death,
[h]Jealousy is as severe as Sheol;
Its flashes are flashes of fire,
[i]The very flame of the Lord.
7 “Many waters cannot quench love,
Nor will rivers overflow it;
If a man were to give all the riches of his house for love,
It would be utterly despised.”
What a way to start! She wishes her husband were like her brother, so she could kiss him and not be despised? Okay, she didn’t say like her brother, but “like a brother”, but that still seems weird. In fact, some may see the way brothers act and think that is a pretty low bar. So we need to figure out what she means by that, and this passage gives us some pretty strong clues.
In v. 3, she wants her groom to hold on to her, with both hands. That’s better, so let’s continue to v. 6 which has some strong words to describe love. It is as strong as death, or like fire, the very flame of the Lord. In the middle we read “Jealousy is as severe as Sheol…”, and so naturally she asks him to put a seal over his heart and on his arm, so that he doesn’t forget his commitment to her.
But there is another side to that statement, as the alternate translation is “Its ardor is as inflexible as Sheol…” You’ve likely heard the saying “when hell freezes over…” which communicates that it doesn’t change. So, real love isn’t going to bend or break. We see this emphasized in v. 7, waters cannot quench love, nor can rivers overflow it. There are some mighty rivers out there, and to say that they cannot stop love is quite the statement.
Finally, she says if a man were to give all his riches, it would not be enough to buy love. The theoretical seller of love would be offended by such a low offer. In comparison to love, his riches would thus be despised and mocked.
So what does she desire when she asks her beloved to be “like a brother”? She desires unshakeable love and trust, someone who will hold on to her through fire, and flood, and even tragedy and loss. And so she should, and so should we love! Many give up when things get tough, or they let love wither and fade.
God calls us to a higher standard in our marriages, so let him help you make your love unbreakable. In a world where nothing in certain, put a seal over your heart, and seal on your arm, and make it count for something real, something worth more than anything this world has to offer.